A road to reboot: The starting point

I can’t precisely say how old I was when I first found a porn magazine, hidden above my big brother bed mattress. I guess that I was 9 or 10, maybe. It was a strange black and white magazine with small pictures and some text, like a comic book.

Me and my brothers used to have a shoes box that we stored our “stuff”, and as a curious child I looked at their boxes. As a second find, again on my big brother box, I found an erotic deck. It was colorful and yet I can remember one or two cards. Once in a while, when everyone was out of home, I took a look at the deck, taking care of keeping the same card order (I was so careful).

I think that my biggest discovery about porn and masturbating happened when I was 13 yo (somewhere in 1997). It can be funny how these memories are still clear on my mind. In my house there was a pantry to store food, a small room with some mess (pans, bowls, some boxes), that needed a fresh paint on the floor. I started working on it, but my mom said that I couldn’t move the furniture, just do an appearance painting. It was Wednesday, my two old brothers and my father was working and my mom went for a shopping, so I was doing the panting alone at home. I started painting and moving things when I found a box that I never saw before. It was heavy, closed with a floor cloth on the top. For my surprise after moving it and removing the cloth, it was full of porn magazines. I was scared, just put if back in place and just painted around the boxes. I was afraid of what I had found and afraid of my mom knowing that I had seen that.

Every Wednesday my mom went out for shopping and spent 3–4 hours out, and then, me alone at home, started to looking the magazines. I never counted it, but I guess that there were 30 or more porn magazines, different kinds (playboy, hustler, private, …). The porn magazines on old days were mostly the same, some pussy, a lot of big boobs, pages and pages of advertisement. I was more interested on one kind of magazine that had a special section where readers sent pictures and a small profile, looking for sex. It was the paper version of Tinder. It had dozens of profiles, and what attracted me the most was pictures of cocks and balls (yes, I’m gay, but it’s another history).